Personal · Word of The Day

Word Of The Day: Building In Silence.

Word Of The Day:

Building In Silence.

Luke 1:24-25 (NIVUK)
24 After this his wife Elizabeth became pregnant and for five months remained in seclusion. 25 ‘The Lord has done this for me,’ she said. ‘In these days he has shown his favour and taken away my disgrace among the people.’

Building In Silence – Dephne Madyara

Oh my word. This spoke to me so much on so many levels, this combined with some of the other videos of Dephne’s that I watched today have really spoken to my heart. This video really took aim at me and my own requests. There is one main thing that I have been praying for, for a long time now and it hasn’t happened. A few times I felt like it was going to happen but it didn’t happen and then the cycle of disappointment and works began.

When that cycle would happen I would ask God to show me what I was doing wrong and then I would also look to myself and start questioning my motives about my request. (My request is not a private request it is one that would be very public if it is God’s will for my life.) At the start of me praying with faith and hope (I may write a post about faith and hope, at some point.) I found that the answers I searched for revealed that within my heart; –really deep down below the surface reasons- was the negative reasons for my request, the things that are not of God. I would then try and tell myself that the pure; good, wholesome reasons for my request would win out; that they would stop me from showing off, bragging, not reflecting God but the devil. (This is a whole post on its own.)

But what this Bible study has shown me is that when you don’t check or test your heart, whatever is lurking beneath -the confidence in flesh things Philippians 3– will cause you to fail when blessings come your way. The wholesome things will be there alongside the negative things.

Elizabeth could not conceive well into her old age but it was 5/6 months, –which is far longer than most women wait nowadays before they share the news of their pregnancies- before anyone knew that she was pregnant. When she finally conceived she did not / could not tell anyone. She didn’t go to her husbands relatives, neighbours anyone who had shamed her for being unable to conceive instead she just carried that baby (John the baptist.) without telling anyone until an angel told her cousin Mary that she too was pregnant.

Luke 1:24-25 (NIVUK)
24 After this his wife Elizabeth became pregnant and for five months remained in seclusion. 25 ‘The Lord has done this for me,’ she said. ‘In these days he has shown his favour and taken away my disgrace among the people.’

This part of the Bible that is so easy to ignore or not understand the magnitude of the story spoke to me. Elizabeth had the right to go to the people who had looked down upon her to share the news but she didn’t. (Elizabeth is not the only Biblical woman who couldn’t conceive, Sarah, Rachel, Hannah, these are the one’s that I know of.) Like Elizabeth I have felt as though God blessing me with my request would change, or remove people’s negative thoughts of me. But the main “good” reason why I wanted this request to come to pass and for me to scream and shout about it was to show God’s glory.

With everything that God blesses us with, His glory will be shown, we don’t need to scream and shout about it. When God gives us a new beginning, from being publicly sinful to being made anew His glory is within that. Wherever we go, regardless of us telling people about walking with God and being forgiven there is a change within us that people can not ignore. So when it comes to God’s glory being shown in His blessings we don’t need to do or say anything they will see it.

Whilst I was watching this video I was reminded of this quote;
“Work Hard In Silence, Let Your Success Be Your Noise.” 

This quote is one that I began implementing at the start of my conscious walk with God. I knew that I needed to be less public about the things that I wanted and was working towards; for a few reasons, disappointment, failure, other people, jealousy, it not being God’s plan, the list goes on. Dephne also mentioned in the above or this video maybe, that sometimes we need to keep things private because not everyone who we share our plans / dreams with has good intentions for us. Sometimes those people who we think are on side are actually wishing us bad, they don’t want us to succeed they want to keep us where they are. In misery and down in the dumps.

What I have taken from this Bible study and some of the other videos that I have watched is that delay is not denial. BUT our response to finally getting what we have requested is what is crucial. When God is preparing us, pruning and attempting to remove any of the things that will lead us down the wrong path we need to listen and remove what God is wanting / needing to remove. We shouldn’t be holding onto those things that will only lead us to other levels of heartbreak.

I imagine what could have happened to Elizabeth if she had shown off; bragged and screamed about God’s blessing prematurely. People around her could have spoken negatively into her life, cursed her all because they were jealous that she had gotten a miracle like they had never seen before. We need to be more cautious with the blessings, desires and purposes that God has for our live. The enemy will use anyone to derail you and remove you from walking into the blessings and purpose for your life. God is bigger than anything that the enemy could throw at us but we can’t just sit back and let God do it all, we have to guard our purposes and not allow any negative thing that is within us to grow.

Take some time to look at the “close” people in your life; look at your heart to see if you could wait before speaking about your blessing and the response of those around you. Whatever the outcome pray that what God blesses you with, you do not use it for negative but you use it for good. 

Side Note;

In the video Dephne mentioned some of the ways in which we plan to show off or brag and one of those was Instagram. I am not going to lie and act like I haven’t thought about bragging using social media especially Instagram. I have thought about it and imagined some people’s faces and conversations if and when they came across my profile. But I knew that this was not of God and I immediately told myself to always make sure that my profile is on private.

I think that like Elizabeth we have to seclude ourselves from certain things when we finally get a blessing, so that we can continue growing within that blessing and we can work on and fix our hearts. Imagine God blessing you with whatever you desire and the first thing you do is post about it on social media. How different would it be if you held back and you posted nothing, you maybe told a few family members or friends if it wasn’t a blessing that you could keep silent like a car or house for e.g. Seclusion is a great time to learn and grow.



Pour From The Cup.

Pour From The Cup.

Ephesians 4:11-13(NIVUK)
11 So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, 12 to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up 13 until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

Sharing Your Story WHILE It’s Being Written.

This week I prayed in my notebook “God Help Me,” this has been a prayer of mine for the past few weeks maybe even months and it has to do with this up and down spiritual funk that I have been in since February. Yikes! Lately I have been really battling things spiritually, I have felt like my life was moving forward and I was starting to get back to being right with God.

When I prayed these words I then watched Joyce Meyer teaching on Ephesians (you’ll find the video here there are a few on there and I can’t remember which one it was.) In this teaching she mentioned this story;

A woman came to her and told her that she had started to pray for her because when she would watch her teachings she wasn’t getting anything out of it and she thought that Joyce had sin within her. But when she prayed God told her that Joyce wasn’t the issue, she was. She was so full on the teachings she’d been hearing and she didn’t have any room for anything else. She first had to pour out and share what she had filled up on in order for her to get anything more. 

Continue reading “Pour From The Cup.”


Christianity Is Enough.

Christianity Is Enough; God Is Enough.

Joshua 24:15 (ESV)
15 And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the Lord, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

I watched a YouTube video in which the person spoke about “being a Christian” but they wanted to explore other religions. When I watched the video I immediately thought NO don’t do it. God is enough, you don’t want to stray from God whilst searching for Him. But a thought popped back into my head, I remembered how and why I was in the same place when I wanted to explore other religions. I wanted to do it purely because I was uncomfortable with Christianity and some of the things that conflict in terms of the world and the bible.

Reading the bible will make you feel uncomfortable, the stories that don’t apply to you and the ones that do apply to you will make you feel a lot of emotions. 

My advice to anyone who is feeling as though they want to explore other religions is DON’T DO IT. God is enough. You may end up losing the relationship that you have with God all because of discomfort or thinking that you don’t have a relationship with Him. Trust me it’s not worth losing God whilst you go out into the world seeking Him in the face of false gods.

I never actually ended up pursuing other religions, but I was being tempted to it and I was rubbing Buddhas belly in an oriental ornament shop (LOL.) But I am thankful that God didn’t allow me to go down that road because I honestly don’t know if I would have made it back to God safely.


Personal · Quote Of The Day

Quote Of The Day: Life Is Not About What God Can Do For Me…

Quote Of The Day:

Life Is Not About What God Can Do For Me…

John 13:7 (NIV UK)
7 Jesus replied, ‘You do not realise now what I am doing, but later you will understand.’

Life is not about

I haven’t posted a quote of the day in a while this one is definitely for me though…

“Life is not about what God can do for me, life is about what I can do for God.”

I have heard maybe one or two people saying that this is a sign of spiritual maturity. When you reach a point where you don’t look to God for what He can do for you but you ask Him what you can do for Him. And I agree with this statement, I think I have become a little immature in my walk with God. Where I was content with it being me and God I am now constantly asking Him for things that show that I am more concerned with gaining and not enough with what I can do for God. My petition(s) are not selfish they just take up a lot of my time, thinking wise and like the young lady said in this video I posted here, “an idol is something that you spend more time thinking about than you do God.” 

I will say this; there is nothing wrong with asking God for what ever you desire. God will speak to you through that which you ask, and obviously when we have God within us we won’t ask for anything that doesn’t reflect God’s presence in our lives. God can do whatever He chooses to do in terms of giving us what we ask for. But we have to know that what we ask for has a purpose. There are minuscule things that we might think don’t serve a purpose but they probably are some of the most helpful things for sharing God’s goodness towards us.

John 14:13 (NIV UK)
13 And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.

Back to what this post is about… there is something that I have been asking God for, for nearly a year now and so far I haven’t received what I am asking for. This has made me start to question where this desire came from – God, self, the devil. – It has also shown me that I have become doubt filled and double minded – And it has also made me think about how I see God, do I only see Him as a genie to grant my wishes or do I have a true relationship with Him. Right now I would have to say that I was starting to develop a relationship with God, an understanding of who He is but then circumstances (that I placed myself in) led me to petitioning God but doubt slipped in and doubt does not get you what or where you need to be it just keeps you in a cycle of petitioning and never receiving what God has for you.

What does this quote mean for those of us who are still maturing? This quote is a bit of hope that we will reach a point where we are asking God but we aren’t just asking for us, we are asking for God’s glory. We are asking God to use our lives for whatever purpose He has for us. Our prayers and petitions are not for God to hear because He knows what we will do, they are for us. They are meant to show us our hearts, the good and the bad.

Don’t stop praying and asking God because if God placed that desire within you He will fulfil it. It may not be the season for it just yet or you have a few lessons and some more maturity in that area before God can give you something that has potential to take your attention away from Him. Trust me not being close to God or removing your attention from Him and onto something like a relationship can be so detrimental to your journey with Him.

I pray that I and anyone who reads this and is also struggling with keeping God first finds their way to the maturity that is desperately needed.

John 15:16 (NIV UK)
16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit – fruit that will last – and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.



Alpha: Week 7 – How Does God Guide Us?


Week 7 – How Does God Guide Us?

Joshua 1:9 (ESV)
9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Alpha: Week 7- How Does God Guide Us? – Nicky Gumbel 

I’m sorry no week six update, I was ill and didn’t attend church but I’ve watched the video (you can too here.) and like all the rest, it was really good and useful on this journey. Like I said in the week 5 post that the conversation showed me the importance of reading the bible. The bible is the most important book on this earth and it will help you to ensure that your name is in the most important book in Heaven. There are many reasons why it’s important to read the bible but one of the most important ones in my opinion especially in this day and age is to know what the bible says. There is a lot of deceitful information out there from within the church and outside of it and knowing what God has to say about himself and us is really valuable because we can’t then be swayed by the devils lies and we can walk into God’s purpose for our lives. I said important quite alot, anyway let’s dive into week 6…

Continue reading “Alpha: Week 7 – How Does God Guide Us?”


“You Should Go And Love Yourself.”

“You Should Go And Love Yourself.”

Proverbs 4:23 (ESV)
23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.

mandy hale

We live in a self-loveless society, a lot of us women don’t have self-worth or self-esteem and this leads us to bedrooms that we have no business being in. We then raise young women who don’t value themselves, we raise young men to devalue women and their bodies and the cycle continues. We have an opportunity to stop that cycle before we have children. Trying to tackle something that we have placed in our children whilst still living in it is difficult task – have you ever told anyone not to do something that they saw you doing? it’s not fun trust me. Moses did it and it was not enjoyable for him; Exodus 2:11.

Sorry but I am not one of those “it’s your sin Christians,” sex has no role outside of marriage apart from to gratify the flesh. If you don’t want to take my word for it, go find it for yourself in the bible.  Continue reading ““You Should Go And Love Yourself.””

Opinion Post · Personal

One Love Manchester.

One Love Manchester.

Mark 12:29-31 (KJV)
29 And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: 30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. 31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.

pray for manny

I watched the One Love concert and it was truly amazing what Ariana and her team pulled off in just a few days. I’m not going to sit here and lie, I know A LOT of her music, I was (maybe still am) a secret fan. The whole concert from start to finish was just beautiful, the music that was picked out, the amount of money that has been raised for the victims, survivors etc. is absolutely amazing.

The most touching moments for me came at the start of the concert (i don’t know if it will have featured on international coverage,) but the BBC went into the crowd to speak to the survivors who had attended the concert and one of the girls said this “we have all adopted each other,” another said “no one is left out, we are making sure everyone is looked after.” This was so beautiful to see and hear and it really convicted me and challenged me a little. I sat there thinking how many times have I sat in church over the past few months and greeted or introduced myself to my neighbour, and it was a big fat zero, yes I know that I carry a lot of baggage to do with people and the church but that is not an excuse to go to church and claim to be like Jesus but not even extend my hand to say hello to someone.

And then the conviction continued, before Katy Perry performed she asked the audience to touch their neighbour and then she told them to say “I love you” to each other. The church girl within her came out but with a twist. I thought about it and I asked myself would I sit in church and say I love you when prompted to by the pastor? Probably Definitely not. 

My mind went into a spin thinking about us as Christians, how we act and react to events like these. How we would react if this had been a Christian gathering, and it wasn’t good. The division within Christianity is astounding.

What did this concert do for me as a Christian, it showed me that Christian unity is a long way away and that I can only do my bit when it comes to living like Jesus. I can not force other people to do anything or change their ways in order for the church to be unified. But I can start by simply greeting my neighbour each time I am in church. A simple hello can make someone feel so welcome in the very place that they need to feel welcome the most.

I challenge you to say hello and introduce yourself to someone in church this week, sit away from who you would normally sit with and greet a stranger. 

I will leave you with this song created by two truly amazing artists, the fact that they put it all together so quickly is beautiful in itself.

This. – May You Speak (Feat. Montell Fish) [#prayformanchester Response Track]